Danky Jenkins
Eden, NC
Yahoo Sports
Sam Kirby spoke to a large Meerkat crowd today at the Meerkat Den bar, adjacent to the Hong-Kong Restaurant located in the Patrick Henry Shopping Center in downtown Martinsville. Kirby spoke for about 45 minutes on topics ranging from the farm system to this year’s playoffs
As the security camera video illustrates, he really whipped up the crowd when talking about the Portland Pats. The Meerkats lost a close series last week to bitter enemy Todd Smith and the Portland Pats. Kirby is no stranger to pep talks and he gave one for the ages. Kirby had a lot to say about the Pats. “The Meerkats will NOT go quietly this year, We will NOT be beaten THIS YEAR, We will not be shoved around ANY LONGER, WE WILL give MEERKAT NATION what its been asking for since 06…A CHAMPIONSHIP. The PATS WILL GO DOWN, AND GO DOWN HARD” With that the crowd erupted. Albert Pujols was so amped up that he punched a South Korean soccer fan. The South Korean was immediately rushed to the hospital. He is expected to make a full recovery.
Kirby also touched on the failure of the Boozehounds to capture what they had last year. “Really, Harrison just caught lightning in the bottle, I was as surprised as anyone. The kid can talk a good game, but his [expletive] is whack. He took what was rightfully ours, WE WILL TAKE IT BACK.” Kirby also entertained a quick question and answer period. Questions like: “what do you think about Abel and the Biscuits?” Kirby’s reply “who, ha. No really, Abel is so inept at picking talent that it hurts the league. [Expletive], my staff calls him the Al Davis of the BIGs.”
Other questions ranged from “Are the Otters going to make the playoffs?” “All signs point to doubtful” to “Name one player the Meerkats should acquire before the trade deadline?” “well our faults are obvious, we need to improve our bullpen.” “Who is your biggest competition?” “Ha, well to be honest its us. We are our toughest competition. If we play like I know we can, nobody can beat us. PERIOD.” Again the crowd erupted.
Kirby continued “The startup [expletive] and his team of college dropouts? Ha. Please let Heyward bat .230 against my team. “The other start up in Canada, phfff..dude can’t even speak English.. Richards? Not a chance, no pitching. Altizer-dude has two testicles for a baseball brain, and they’re busying humping each other for a quick high for Altizer to be a competent manager. You ever seen him try and call a hit in run in the 9th? Boy lacks the gumption for the nitty gritty of baseball. Vinson…please he’s so far up his wife’s ass that he doesn’t even know what a double play is.” When asked about Bergmann…”well he scares me, true, but again I don’t see it happening”
Meerkats
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